Imperfect. Klein Bottles - One third off!
(As of November 2018 none available, due to annular solar eclipse)
(I expect to put about a dozen on sale around late February or early March 2019 - check back then)
Although we strive to manufacture the finest glass manifolds, ACME's esteemed Glassblower, E. Eddy Edsel, has been known to make mistakes.
As a result of Acme's commitment to Total Quality Manglement, our Seven Sigma Error Stomp uncovered a few not-quite-good-enough Klein Bottles. These are for sale at two thirds the regular price.
Yep, you heard me right. One third off. And only available here, the Acme Zero Volume Factory Outlet. For a limited time only (which is to say, "until I run out") When these are gone, I don't know when I'll have more.
What's wrong with 'em? Mostly minor cosmetic blemishes: weld spatter, oven marks, or finishing flaws. Sometimes it's a scratched area on the inside (or outside, seeing how it's the same). Some are mis-shapen: a slight kink in the loop or too wide/narrow around the base. A few are tippy when placed on a flat table (when I goofed on the center-of-gravity or didn't make the base sufficiently flat). Indeed, the flaws are sufficiently minor that they're hard to photograph. I toss out the real bloopers and those that with cracks. All are immersed in 3-dimensions -- sorry, no 4-dimensional seconds.
If you don't like the Klein Bottle you receive, you can return it for a refund. So far, nobody has done so, suggesting that even our 2nd-quality Klein Bottles are pretty good.
In every other way, these behave like Acme's other Klein Bottles ... made of glass, one handle, one side, rustproof, Y2K compliant, etc. Each comes with Acme's unconditional guarantee. If you aren't happy with it, return if for a refund.
Acme follows the strictest ISO-9000 standards for grading Klein Bottles. Happily, International Standards Organizations have not made any Klein Bottle standards, so this is pretty easy: As a result, I grade my Klein Bottles as follows:
So what happens to the 3rds, 4ths, and 5ths? I toss 'em out or give 'em to friends. My friends then smile and walk away with quizzical looks on their faces.
I suggest that you do not give these as gifts, since they do not reflect my highest quality work. Also, it's a bit of a tweak to receive a box that says a gift is a second-quality item.
The Klein Bottle - Wine Bottles are fine glassware, except that they are tippy - the angle at which they sit on the table causes them to tip over unless there is liquid in them.
Now available from Acme's wastebin
warehouse: